"it's bad bad bad bad!"

[rockthecliche]

last night, i managed to sway taysqueak to the dark side, that is, a certain smiley king who's obsessed with food. extremely image heavy. huge pictures forthwith, because i'm too lazy to manually resize every single one in photobucket.

the MASSU picspam


because i'd take cute and giggly over dead fish eyes anyday.





why do i love massu? let me count the ways.


because he has somehow managed to not change a single bit since the tender age of what looks to be 5.


case in point. this was taken back in 2004 and he still looks EXACTLY THE SAME. moving on.


because he can wear navy blue pajama-type-looking-pants with white stars with a fabulous pink shirt. and sit on elton john's star out in hollywood at the same time. and he can do all of this and still be manlier than all of news combined.


he can also wear leopard print and what may be the shortest shorts to have graced news' legs -- and still be manlier than koyama. i rest my case.


and he also shows no sort of worry over being in a skirt. just saying.


and he can wear that ridiculous moustache and it's clear that he's being such a creeper but he makes it adorable. i dare you to find someone else who can do the same!


while we're on the topic of manliness and clothing, he is the only johnny's member i have seen who will always, without fail, wear baggy pants/jeans, and he never, ever crosses his legs.


unless he's sitting cross-legged on the floor. and looking like he's 5 ;awhfe idk how he does it.


he can also make plastic flowers look sexy instead of tacky.


there is a reason why he gets called the pig, other than his eating habits.


case...


in...


point.

FOOD TIME.






























but of course, like all good idols...


...all excess calories are automatically converted into muscle mass.


and how.


but of course...


when we're talking about massu...


the first thing that pops into everyone's mind is...


his ridiculously charming smile that goes on for ages.


i have never seen him angry...


upset...


melancholy...


insincere...


pissed off, or even remotely annoyed.


which is why he's my favorite. because, you see...


to me, he gives off this amazing vibe.


the vibe that he absolutely, 100% loves his job.


that he genuinely enjoys being in news,
























(but it's okay, i'd make a similar face if yamapi was trying to kiss me, bb)


and he's incredibly grateful for what got him there to begin with.


he's always thankful to others,


and happy to help whenever someone needs it.


that's why i love massu.


having a gloomy...


insecure...


distraught... (this picture makes me ;awhf;oei so sad omg i just want to hug him)


massu is kind of like tits on a duck -- what's the point?


...


...


just kidding!


(even though it's kind of hot. um. what.)

so what have we learned today?


massu's eyes resemble brock's from pokemon.


he has a thing for pigs.


he loves his food!


and obnoxious clothing.


he's also 1/6 of news.


and makes it work better than any of them.


but in the end...


...he'll always look like a big little kid, looking brightly at the world.

THE END



no tegomass music videos, mostly because i cannot stomach watching more than 30 seconds of tegoshi in a row. so here are my four favorite news music videos, mostly new one's because there were a bajillion of them prior to these. shut up, they all go by really fast!

news - "summer time". points to note: massu spends the majority of the time with a lifering around his waist, his D: face when ryo washes a hole into his shirt, the super concerned look on his face for said t-shirt, and oh, the fact that he is the only one on screen for about 15 seconds in the beginning. ALSO the big ryo and massu hug at the very end! it made me go 'awwww!' out loud today.

news - "weeeek". points to note: anytime massu flails and does his little running in place jig with his hands fanned out in front of him. and ryo's manhandling. OMG WTF I AM GOING TO END UP SHIPPING RYO/MASSU WHO DOES THAT. anyway, i'm sure there are other things, too, that i forgot to mention, but idk, i'm usually too preoccupied with dancing to this song to notice a lot...

news - "hoshi wo mezashite". points to note: massu's ninjaing ways! lots of general news shenanigans in this one. i hate yamapi's hair.

news - "happy birthday"; the one that started it all. points to note: massu's special animation part is making a hamburger. he and yamapi also take simultaneous bites of it. massu's pants can fit the entire population of hogwarts in them, no lie.

with that -- I HOPE YOU'VE ALL LEARNED SOMETHING. idk what it is, but um, you know. i uploaded 160 pictures to photobucket, i was clearly dedicated to the cause. D:

Comments

[polyurethane.livejournal.com]

Yay Massu. ♥

He's such a wonderful dork. And I love his fashion sense (or lack thereof) because it reminds me of mine.

[rockthecliche.livejournal.com]

his fashion sense is TOTALLY BOSS. the boy is just blessed with amazing genes.

[polyurethane.livejournal.com]

I have the same ridic fashion sense so I can certainly agree.

[chelshock.livejournal.com]

oh my god. what is this feeling? ... i think it's love.

i. just. i can see myself getting into the massu-love purely based on how much he eats. and food on the face (http://i18.photobucket.com/albums/b126/edentity/massuspam/2df961c862a640_full.jpg) is a weird weak point for me already. massu looks like he can give hiro a run for his money in the "number of ridiculous eating photos" department, which i am COMPLETELY OKAY with. and oh god, what is this (http://i18.photobucket.com/albums/b126/edentity/massuspam/d3fdad8f38e020_full.jpg)? i'm dying, seriously. his smile! it's so precious. even ryo can't resist (http://i18.photobucket.com/albums/b126/edentity/massuspam/os20052706.jpg)!

i don't even know what else to say. member by member, i'm going to become charmed with news and i'm not really prepared for that. well, except for yamapi. i don't think it's possible to make a yamapi picspam that would endear him to me.

thank you so much for this! he really is precious. ♥ ♥ ♥

[rockthecliche.livejournal.com]

RIGHT? omg i refused to believe that there was NOTHING wrong with him when i first dabbled in news. so far, the only bit of dirt i've scooped up is that he used to have a crush on kitagawa keiko and he reads men's fashion magazines.

i purposely DIDN'T put any pictures of him from 'rescue' and on, because he lost so much weight during all the training that his face looks so HOLLOW and it bothers me SO MUCH because the cheeks. THE CHEEKS. (and the god awful hair, but that's neither here or there...) i'm seriously praying that now that rescue's over, he can go back and eat all the gyoza in the world to gain some of it back. *fingers crossed!*

and i honestly have no idea what that crying picture was, but i have it and i die a little bit on the inside every time i see it. AND RYO. i don't even have words. remember how i was telling you that he's pretty much a douche to everyone in news except yamapi? he has a pretty big soft spot for massu, too, i've realized. not that he treats him exceptionally well, but he never has anything bad to say about massu at all. ♥ doing this picspam has made me into a ryo/massu shipper. i can't even believe myself.

LOL it's okay, i only have pictures of massu, so for the other 4, you're on your own! you can be like me with kat-tun, though, and listen to the music and just be desperately in love with one of the six. it works for me!

NO PROBLEM. anything to spread the massu love! :D

[chelshock.livejournal.com]

lol i love that reading men's fashion magazines is somehow dirt. now reading "men's magazines" or even women's fashion magazines would be something slightly scandalous.

see, i think rescue is the reason i've confused massu and shige? without the cheeks, massu's face is kind of shige-shaped. hair and clothing wise, since you mentioned it, i really appreciate that he's not really concerned with looking exactly like the rest of the group. it's a nice change. (though idk that's something that bothers me about jun. weird.)

clearly i need to do some ryo/massu research. because anyone who can get ryo smiling like he's hanging out with k8 is obviously full of magic and they should never be apart. :D having a soft spot for massu is probably inevitable, though. how could you NOT love him?

if i remember how dorky ryo can be, i'm probably set. koyama is also kind of adorable to me, so i'm halfway there, i guess? idk about tego and yamapi though. i just don't see myself warming up to them. shige seems really neutral to me, but that's probably just because i don't know anything about him. :/

[rockthecliche.livejournal.com]

RIGHT? i'm a little like, "jesus christ, massu, EVEN YOUR 'DIRT' MAKES ME GIGGLE." watch he has some secret like, bondage fetish or something. lol forever.

YES. i can definitely see that. and the hair was just way too short, i think, and made his entire face look so AWKWARD. and it's pretty much endearing to know that he's a lot like me when he goes shopping. he just looks at something and knows whether or not it'll look good, and he'll just buy them without trying anything on, and it's always the most ridiculously colored and patterned things. (i think it just depends; jun goes for the 'i'm sophisticated and hot' look whereas massu goes for the 'ZEBRA PRINT IS FUN!' look.)

i don't even know if there's ryo/massu research to be done. i feel like i'm the only one who supports it again LOL story of my goddamn life. there was a few fic written. idk, i'll have to watch some of their concert backstage stuff over or something. ryo talks about him a little when he went on hanamaru cafe, too, but i know you hate hanamaru cafe. ^^;;

koyama....................i'm actually convinced koyama's an alien. i can't really explain why! but i do. D: tegoshi, honestly, is kind of the saddest thing in news because i actually started off LOVING him, but this was when he wasn't so full of himself i wanted to puke. it's so sad. he's undoubtedly the best singer in news, but once he actually believed it himself, his ego grew, no holds barred. it's really sad. :/ and OH MY GOD SHIGE. shige. shige is a law major because he thought it would sound impressive, he goes to aoyama university (it's pretty much another ivy league-esque school) and he used to cry when news came back from their hiatus because he thought no one liked him at all, within the group and their fans. he's really all kinds of precious, cause he has a slightly cocky attitude but it doesn't really bother me! his appearance on shounen club premium is so golden; you should watch it when you get the chance! :D

[chelshock.livejournal.com]

oh god, it'd be a bob crane situation. the innocent-looking ones always have the most surprising fetishes. who knows what junno's hiding! XD

see, that's amazing to me. i'm so picky about the fit of my clothing and i'm short enough where a lot of things have the possibility of making me look stumpy, so i have to try everything on before i buy it. but yes, what's the point of clothing if it's not expressing something, right. well, obviously to cover us up, but you know what i mean.

oh. damn. why are the most genius pairings so rare? and more importantly, why don't more people in fandom think like you? i'm guessing ryo/yamapi is the most common, though i really don't see the fun in shipping something where most of the work is already done for me.

haha hanamaru cafe just reminds me of those weird local talk shows where the hosts can't think of enough questions to ask the guest so they just talk about whatever the hell they can think of. the photo section and the bit where they eat the guest's choice of breakfast is cute, though!

lol i can see that with koyama. he kind of has that "too strange for this world" look about him. tegoshi looks really cute and sweet, though! but i've heard the self-centered thing before, which is definitely tragic but i guess i'm not that surprised. he's hailed as supercute and the best singer in his group. then again, there's ohno, who must know that people gush about his singing and dancing and he's still... actually, i don't know what goes on in ohno's head. for all i know, he is full of himself and just hides it behind his spaciness.

haha i love that shige chose his major based on how awesome it would sound. news is all about the drama, isn't it? they all seem to be emo about something. D: shige fanboys sho, right? or is that mostly fan-created? i get where that idea is coming from, though. cocky smart boys who are not nearly as crazy as their bandmates are a match made in heaven.

[melonpunch.livejournal.com]

D00d you did a great job with this!

NOW HOW ABOUT A SHIGGY PICSPAM?! =D

[rockthecliche.livejournal.com]

i...only have pictures of massu. ^^;;; i guess i've been meaning to start collecting shige pictures, but i just get lazy because...well, he's not massu.

[girlearthless.livejournal.com]

Eeeeeeeeee nearly died from the cute. He's probably my favourite member out of NewS *_* He looks so deceptively cute and squishy yet he's so strong? I watched the backstage parts of one of their dvds and I was just like a;lsdfjsdlfsd *_*

[rockthecliche.livejournal.com]

THE PART WHERE HE CAN FLIP HIMSELF UPSIDE DOWN JUST BY HOLDING ONTO THE BACKS OF TWO CHAIRS AND HOLD HIMSELF THAT WAY. i actually gaped the first time i saw that. D:

[whoompah.livejournal.com]

ADSFGHJ this boy is so cute! X3 he needs more recognition <3

[rockthecliche.livejournal.com]

IKR? and idk, as much as i think more recognition would be AWESOME, i kind of like him the way he is. argh, i don't know. D: at least he's pretty well liked by news fans, so i can settle for that?

[andshehopes.livejournal.com]

LOL OMG that .gif is so adorkable. this kid is qt :) so lol at me getting into all things azn.

ps. pansy misses ron.

[rockthecliche.livejournal.com]

lol i saw! boys over flowers and everything! (psst: the japanese version is better, if only for the main character's ridiculous hair.) and ikr? this kid puts a smile on my face when everything else fails. ♥

ps: ron misses pansy, too! ): i was actually just thinking how much i missed rping, but idk where to look for a good hp one.

[andshehopes.livejournal.com]

i'm actually watching the japanese version when i'm at work. i love how feisty the girl is. jan di was in the beginning and then she just got so whiny and OOC imo. but jun pyo & ji hoo were sososo hot so i stayed for them.

my fav k-drama so far has been coffee prince. it was just perfection.

[wojiaolei.livejournal.com]

I don't know him. BUT I like his hair!

Oh and he's cute... *SHOT*

[sling90.livejournal.com]

Just read this. And Junno's. Gonna add you as a friend, hope you don;t mind!